The Golden Dubs: Episode 1 — Thank Me Later
Short fiction series about GSW’s 4 vets — Steph, Klay, Dray & Dré
LOGLINE: Four 4-time champions live together in San Francisco, sharing their various experiences together and mentoring young dubs so they’d thrive.
Episode 1: Thank Me Later
Steph seeks his friends’ advice about a possible endorsement deal. Klay needs to prove that Rocco’s not the next-door neighbor’s doggie-daddy.
It’s another foggy day in ‘Frisco (btw, SF residents don’t vibe with San Fran), and the golden dubs (Steph, Klay, Dray & Dré) are sitting on recliners in their living room.
They are unaware of what the weather looks like outside. But inside their high-rise apartment, a little bit of drama is about to unfold.
Steph sighs heavily as he reads an email from his phone. Klay nods at Steph.
Klay: You alright, Steph?
Steph: I don’t know, Klay. I am deeply perturbed about this email my agent sent.
Dray stands up and rubs his chin.
Dray: Yo, Steph! Is this a “me” problem or a “we” problem?
Dré: C’mon, Dray, Let Steph provide more context on why he’s deeply perturbed.
Steph gets up and starts pacing back and forth as he stares at his phone. They all stare at him like a tennis ball in a grand slam tournament match. Dray gets up and halts Steph from pacing.
Dray: Be like Nas and tell us what was written.
Steph: You promise not to laugh?
Klay, Dray & Dré nod. Steph places his phone inside his pocket and looks at them for their reaction.
Steph: A’ight. My agent wants me to do “Icy Hot.”
They avoid eye contact with Steph, and after about a few seconds of awkward silence, Dray chuckles.
Steph: I knew it. I shouldn’t have shared.
Steph plops himself on his recliner, defeated. Klay gets up and massages Steph’s shoulder, comforting him.
Klay: Don’t sweat it, Steph. Think about it this way: Icy Hot wants you ‘coz you been killin’ the false narratives of how you messed up the game.
Dré: Yeah, Steph. Klay’s right. Like “Icy Hot,” isn’t it ironic how you seemed to messed up the game and yet every team be splashing like you and Klay.
Dray claps and proudly utters:
Dray: Yo, Steph! I ain’t gonna lie to ya, you know this ‘bout me. Think it through, my man. Remember the last time you did a campaign with the Big Diesel.
Steph: You’re right, Dray. I got burned, man.
Klay: So bad, Steph. Burn like Ellie Goulding.
Dray: Forget “Icy Hot,” bruh. Like Ariana said, “Thank u, next.”
Dré: Come to think of it, three-letter brand deals are sketchy lately, fellas.
Klay counts with his fingers, then proudly states:
Klay: Icy Hot’s six letters, tho, Dré.
Dré: You right, Klay. I was referring to “F-T-X,” “S-V-B,” and dealing with a dude like “S-B-F.”
Dray: That’s right! Naughty by nature to be messin’ wit “O-P-C.”
Klay: Preach, Dray. Rule number 1 in the O-P-C establishment, “Don’t gamble with Other People’s Currency.”
Steph: Noted! That’s what I get for being so trusting. It’s hard being the good guy all the time, ya know?
Steph daps his squad.
Steph: Thank you, my dudes. You always got my back.
Klay: Apparently, so does “Icy Hot.”
They all chuckle. A loud PING. Everyone checks their phones. Klay gets up and shakes his head.
Dray: Yo, Klay. Is it a “he” or “she” problem?
Dré: C’mon, Dray. We all know Klay ain’t bothered by jealous dudes. It’s gotta be a “she” problem, right?
Klay: Actually, my dudes, it’s a “he” problem.
They shoot Klay a confused look.
Klay: Our neighbor claims Rocco is their doggie’s daddy.
Steph: For real, Klay? Was it a planned pregnancy? Tell us. No judgment here.
Klay massages his forehead, disturbed. Dray massages Klay’s shoulders, comforting him.
Dray: You think Rocco’s ready to be a daddy?
Dré: That’s a big responsibility for Rocco, Klay.
Klay: What if Rocco ain’t really the doggie’s daddy? How do I prove it?
Steph: How far along is the neighbor’s female dog?
Klay scrolls through his Instagram.
Klay: Well…Rocco got tagged on an IG pic of the female dog two weeks ago.
Dray sighs heavily.
Dray: C’mon, bruh! You hid this big news from us for two weeks now?
Dré: Uncool, Klay. You should’ve told us.
Klay shakes his head, defeated.
Klay: My bad, my dudes. What do I do now?
Steph, Dray, and Dré type on their phones. Steph shows his phone to Klay.
Steph: It says here on this site, “It can take anywhere from 48 to 73 hours for a female dog’s eggs to completely be fertilized. During the first week, roughly 7 to 10 days after mating…
Dray proudly shows his phone to Klay.
Dray: Yo, Klay! Rocco’s not the daddy.
Dré: What makes you say that, Dray?
Dray shows an Instagram picture of Dray’s kids with Rocco.
Dray: My kids were watching Rocco about two weeks ago.
Klay shoots Dray a nervous smile.
Klay: Thanks for having my back, Dray. Actually, Rocco can’t pull a “Shaggy.”
Steph: What do you mean, Klay?
Klay: I came home three weeks ago, and JP was supposed to be dogsitting, but you know him and baddies.
Dré: So, what happened? Expound more, please, Klay.
Klay: Yeah, like what I was saying, I came home then I was looking for Rocco but couldn’t find him. I was yelling JP’s name, and he wasn’t responding. Then I heard some commotion on our neighbor’s patio, and I saw…
Dray: Who did you see, Klay?
Klay: I caught Rocco red-handed, creepin’ with the female dog next door. Actually, I saw Rocco numerous times. I figured he was shootin’ blanks. But, I guess I was wrong. It was him. My bad, fellas. I was in denial.
Steph, Dray, and Dré tap Klay’s shoulders in collective support of Rocco’s predicament.
Steph: Everything’s gonna be alright, Klay.
Dray: Yeah, my man. Ayo, Klay…
Dré: Don’t say it, Dray. I know what you ‘bout to ask Klay.
Klay: No, Dray. I ain’t gonna talk ‘bout Rocco’s drama in your podcast.
Dray flashes a hearty grin.
Dray: Just shooting my shot, my dude. Speaking of which…yo, Steph…
Steph types on his phone and sends his agent a text:
TEXT MESSAGE: “Hey, Jeff! Passing on Icy Hot. Hit up Dray, he’s the perfect guy for the job.
Steph: Thank me later, Dray!
They all chuckle and stare outside their floor-to-ceiling glass view. The fog dissipates in the background. The drama is over. For now. Because there’s more to come.
END OF EPISODE 1
Check out Episode 2: Certified Lover Boy
Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Any names or characters, businesses or places, events or incidents are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. In short, this is a fanboy’s short story series rebrand/reimagination of a TV series with his favorite NBA players.
